Welcome aboard our newly introduced Relationships and Marriage segment in Weekend Hope! This page is dedicated to exploring the joys and challenges of relationships and marriage, as well as addressing the everyday issues that arise in these important areas of our lives.
Here, we provide practical advice, valuable tips, and thoughtful solutions to help navigate the complexities of relationships. With God’s guidance, we trust these discussions will bring hope, healing, and harmony to many.
We’re delighted to have you join us on this journey. Once again, a heartfelt welcome!
You can get your requests, problems etc across to us through this email – [email protected].
Warm regards

 Aunty Ronke.

Good day ma, please kindly keep my identity confidential. I am a lady in my early 20s and have been in a relationship with a man who is eight years older than me for the past five years. My wish is to take the relationship to a more serious level, but my concern now is that he never seems serious whenever I bring up the topic of settling down; always changing the subject.

This never bothered me until recently when he introduced me to his parents and siblings, who were in town for a visit, as a colleague from his office delivering a message to him. I confronted him after they left, and to my surprise, he did not give me a sensible response but rather ignored my question.

I am unsure whether to leave him or give him more time and continue with the relationship, as I really love him, and he is my first love. I urgently need your advice on this matter.

Toyin, Ado Ekiti

My dear Toyin, there are many signs to watch out for in a relationship. If a man finds it difficult to introduce you to his family or avoids discussing settling down whenever the topic comes up, my dear sister, that is a red flag. It is better for you to leave because those are signs he is not considering you as a life partner.

Additionally, pay attention to how he treats you and others. If he shows a lack of respect, is overly secretive, or often makes excuses for bad behaviour, those are also warning signs. A healthy relationship should be built on trust, respect, and open communication.

Notice if he makes an effort to prioritise you in his life. If he consistently avoids spending time with you, disregards your feelings, or fails to support your goals and dreams, it is a sign that the relationship may not have a strong foundation.

Remember, you deserve to be with someone who values, respects, and loves you wholeheartedly. Do not be afraid to walk away if the relationship does not align with your values or aspirations. It is better to wait for the right person than to settle for someone who does not appreciate your worth.

Take care of yourself, my dear sister, and choose wisely.

Aunty Ronke.

Dear Aunty Ronke,

I am a married woman in my early 40s with three daughters, and my husband is in his mid-50s. Our marriage was everything I ever dreamed of during the first six years, but things started to go wrong when I gave birth to my third child, who turned out to be another girl. By this time, I had already had two daughters, and my mother-in-law took it upon herself to challenge me after the birth of my second child. She said that if I had another girl, she would personally throw my belongings out of her son’s house and bring in another woman who could give them boys, as her son needs an heir to continue their lineage and legacy.

Since then, I have been living in hell, just as my mother-in-law promised. To make matters worse, my husband is supporting her, even though he knows that it is the man who determines the sex of the child, not the woman.

I am now at a crossroads and on the verge of losing my mind because they are making the house unbearable for me. I urgently need your advice on what to do before I go crazy.

Rose, Lagos

Dear Rose,

I deeply sympathise with what you are going through at the hands of your mother-in-law and husband.

My sincere advice to you is to take charge of your life and stay strong for your daughters. Do not let anyone or anything distract you because your girls are your future.

Surround yourself with people who can support you and have a positive impact on your life. Consider becoming more independent by acquiring new skills that will keep you engaged and productive.

Focus on creating a peaceful and nurturing atmosphere at home for your daughters. Fill their lives with love, encouragement, and guidance so they grow into confident and resilient individuals.

Stay focused and do not let the situation weigh you down. Be strong for your daughters because they truly need you in an environment like this.

Amidst your responsibilities, remember to take care of yourself. Engage in activities that uplift your spirit, whether it’s reading, spending time outdoors, or visiting friends. A healthy and happy you is essential for your daughters’ well-being.

Do not forget to pray always, for with God on your side, nothing is impossible. Raise your girls with faith, helping them discover and develop the blessings and gifts God has bestowed upon them.

Stay calm and trust that, in time, your prayers will be answered. Your husband and his mother may come to realise the consequences of their actions and retrace their steps.

Remember, challenges are temporary and often pave the way for growth and blessings. Your daughters need you to be their strength, and you are more than capable of providing that.

You are stronger than you realise, and your unwavering love for your daughters will carry you through.

Warm regards,

Aunty Ronke

Dear Aunty Ronke,

I am a young married woman in my mid-30s with two children. I live with my mother-in-law and two brothers-in-law in my husband’s house somewhere in Ondo State, as my husband is based abroad. They told him they would keep me company to ensure I would not be lonely in the house, and I agreed because I thought their intentions were genuine.

However, less than six months after we moved in, following my husband’s departure, they began to misbehave, giving me orders and imposing boundaries on what I should and should not do in the house.

My brother-in-law started seizing the car keys whenever I wanted to go out or take the children to school, insisting I take a cab instead. His excuse was that the car belonged to his brother and he needed it. What started as a joke soon became a regular occurrence.

To make matters worse, my mother-in-law supports his actions. I now feel like a stranger or a slave in my own home, as I must ask for permission to do anything. I am also not allowed to receive visitors.

My biggest problem now is that my brother-in-law has turned the house into a clubhouse, frequently bringing different people over for parties almost every day.

I cannot let my husband hear about this, as he does not tolerate such behaviour, and my mother-in-law has threatened me not to tell him. She warned that if I do, he will cut them off entirely and evict them from the house.

I am so confused by the whole situation and really need your advice on what to do and how to handle it.

Sola, Ondo State.

Dear Sola,

I sympathise with you regarding what you are experiencing at the hands of your in-laws. It is a pity that you are being treated badly, especially knowing that your husband is not around. I cannot imagine the mental stress you must be going through.

I would advise you to try and make peace with them, beginning by letting your mother-in-law see you as her own daughter. Make sure to study her mood carefully before taking any action. Make her realise that if her daughter was being treated the way you are, how would she feel?

Make her understand that you are automatically her daughter since you married her son. Remember to choose your words wisely so as not to offend her.

Encourage her to talk to your brother-in-law as well and persuade her that you do not wish to speak to your husband about the matter. Instead, express that all of you should live in peace and harmony as one big family.

Help her realise what the outcome might be if the situation persists and your husband is informed.

I believe that with this approach, she will reason with you and call her son to order, leading to peace.

However, if this approach does not yield any positive results, it may be advisable to let your husband know what you are going through once and for all.

I wish you the best.

Aunty Ronke