By Josephine Oguntoyinbo
Friendship is very important when it comes to building a relationship as being friends gives you the opportunity to get to know the person, who he is and chances to learn things about him.
According to studies, when you jump into a relationship without being friends first, all types of issues and challenges may occur.
Then, you will begin to expect much from the person and sometimes set unrealistic expectations. Therefore, by putting friendship before a relationship, will make you to easily decide whether he is the perfect one to date or not as there will be no pretence but more open space to talk about things that matter.
Also, not knowing details about him will put so much pressure on him because of your own expectations and desires, but when you develop a genuine friendship, there are no expectations, you will be able to be yourself and he can as well be himself.
Likewise, through friendship, you can learn everything you want to know about each other. You will not have to worry about pretending to be someone you are not, while he can as well relax and not have to worry about answering you any questions.
That means you can basically put the ball in his hands and you give him the opportunity to lead. Developing a bond of friendship before a relationship is definitely better than just letting attraction get the better of you and discovering later that you can not even be good lovers.
The beauty of starting as friends is that you already know the other person. Usually, in the first stages of dating, you try to be as attractive as possible while simultaneously trying to get to know one another. But by dating a friend, you do not have to worry about that, because you are probably already comfortable and familiar with each other. This person already likes you for who you are, so you just have to move forward with him.
By being friends first, you will probably already know about each other’s past relationships, childhood memories, likes and dislikes. This gives you an advantage of knowing what and what not to do while in a relationship with him because you already know what makes him frustrated and happy.
From experiences, it is fun to date a friend, because everyone else may not expect you to get together , but you will discover that it is exciting to date your friend, this makes the relationship even better.
Communication is a major key to any successful relationship, not just talking about how you speak to each other, but about understanding where you are coming from and being able to respond accordingly. Sometimes arguments spark in a conversation between couples not just because they disagree but because of the way they deliver and receive each other’s messages.
Spending time as friends give you both the opportunity to see what type of activities you are into. You get to see how each person lives and then decide whether or not you two can share each other’s lifestyle.
However, to see how good of a match two people are, is not an easy step. In fact, this is usually what people realized after the relationship failed.
It will make you to learn to grow a level of respect for someone that you are friends with and you will see each other for who you really are and accept each other flaws and great qualities. Of course, over time good friends can make great loving soul mates, because you have already had time to build up trust, which is a foundation for any healthy relationship.
Meanwhile, being friends before lovers give you a reason to fall in love all over again simply because you will always be surprised with the small things your lover does for you.
In addition, being friends before lovers allows you to make good memories and reflect on your journey together.
Being friends before being lovers gives you a chance to find common interests with your partner. Furthermore it allows you to have something to grow your relationship on.
Meanwhile, if friendship does not occur before you start dating, it does not mean you cannot build a happy home, it all depends on how you handle and make things work