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Monday, December 5, 2022

Hard time threatens family ties

By Sunmola Olowookere


As the economic crunch takes its toll on the society, families are also feeling the pinch as some wives no longer submit to their husbands.
It is as if their condition for respect and submission is tied to the ability of the husband to maintain them in comfort at all times.
When comfort flies out of the window, most hitherto submissive and docile wives turn to shrews as tempers are easily provoked.
Responsible men are having a most difficult time in meeting the demands of their family, only a few are able to keep their families in the comfort they are accustomed to.
The hard times that is all over the country now is also biting hard in our neighbourhood as the crunch is pulling couples and families apart.
Couples no longer share things as most of them are at loggerheads. They all hide money from each other.
The new Mr. and Mrs. that used to take lovey-dopey walks in the evening are no longer the same as things are no longer rosy between them.
The husband had been living in our neighbourhood before they got married. They courted for two years and shortly after her service year, they got married.
Their union was so blissful as he provided everything she needed. They had three kids in quick succession. They were an example to the upcoming youths in our neighbourhood of what a marriage should be.
After 7 years of marriage, the husband lost his job. He was devastated and he got home expecting to be cuddled and assured that everything will be well but he was disappointed.
The wife shouted as if someone had died. “How will we cope? What did you do? I know that the company cannot sack you over nothing. What will you do now?”
She also began to tell her friends her predicament and within a short while, everyone was aware of what was transpiring in their household.
The poor man was shocked at his wife’s attitude. He had thought that his wife would assure him that they would live on her salary for the meantime. But instead, she went on railing him at him for being careless and at the company for being merciless.
Wisely, he learnt to keep his peace. He knew that if he should speak, it would be disastrous. That marked the beginning of trouble in their household.
With each need that the wife provides, she will accuse him of not trying more in his search for a job and forcing her to do his duties. She would regret that had she known, she would not have had three kids.
With each of this maltreatment, his morale dropped. He could no longer endure her tantrums. The next available offer of job that came along, he gladly took it though it was lowly paid.
This however generated more problems as he could not keep his family in the way they were living before.
He blamed himself for his earlier extravagance as his wife who had grown accustomed to height of comfort found it hard to relinquish the memory. His wife in annoyance had to resume some of those things she left for him when he got another job. Since then, it has been one quarrel or the other.
It was obvious that love was lost between the two. Her parents made their home their second base and they no longer enjoy any privacy.
Their home has become a sort of war zone with the wife’s mother always on her daughter’s side whenever the couple quarrel.


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