#In Our Neigbourhood

‘My husband wants me dead’

By Sunmola Olowookere

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A housewife has fled from her matrimonial home saying that her husband who is a pastor wants her dead. She is bent on seeking a divorce although the church elders had tried to intervene in the matter. She tells anyone that was ready to listen that her husband was after her life as he had threatened to kill her several times when they had altercations.

The church elders begged her not to spread such vicious rumours as it could undermine the integrity of the Church and the pastor, but she was adamant as she maintained that letting as many people as possible know about her predicament could guarantee her safety and that should the eventuality happen, they would know who caused her death.

She accused him of committing adultery with some women in the church. She also disclosed that he was fetish despite being a well known pastor in their neighbourhood. Presently she had dragged him to court and demanding for the land on which they were building a residential building.

She claimed that the plot on which the building was constructed was bought by her and that she also contributed majorly to the construction of the building.

She told the magistrate that she took loans to finance the project being a civil servant while her husband who was a clergy did not have much money which was why she pitched in to help.

The husband however refused to come to court saying he never married her and that they were only cohabitating as he did not “do anything on her head”. He also claimed that he was the one who bought the land and solely built the house on it.

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She felt very bitter and ashamed and then regretted the day she ran away from home to be with him, almost twenty five years ago. She recalled how her parents kicked against their union saying that he would amount to no good.

When she was adamant, her parents had gone to the extent of locking her inside the house but she eventually managed to elope with her husband which brought her parents’ heavy displeasure upon her.

About two years later, she came back with a baby and her husband in tow seeking for forgiveness. Although her parents were sad at her disobedience, they had no choice but to overlook her mistakes and forgive her.

 They were also softened at the sight of their little grandson who was crawling by then and had latched on to his grandmother as if he knew her all along. Their relationship got better. However, her parents’ warnings and predictions about her husband came to the fore some years into the union. She discovered that her husband was a womanizer. When she took him to task about it, he pounced on her and beat her black and blue.

When trouble reared its ugly head in her paradise, she could not tell her parents about it as she knew how they had warned her against marrying him. But for the three children she had for him; 24, 22 and 18 years respectively, she would have felt that 25 years of her life had simply been wasted. Her children were her world as their father no longer had time for her. He would even flaunt his affairs before her eyes.

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He had no iota of shame that as a pastor, he was seen having affairs with the women he was supposed to mentor and show the path to holy living.

Currently, the woman wanted out of. the relationship as the man continually threatens to kill her one day.

Although her parents were still alive and would witness the shame she had been trying to cover, she no longer cares.

She was ready for a divorce as all her sons were made to understand the gravity of the situation and how the marriage had broken down irretrievably.

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