By Maria Famakinwa
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The debate on whether or not bride price should be scrapped has continued to generate diverse reactions. Bride price is the money the groom gives to the bride’s father on the day of traditional marriage in accordance to the tradition and culture of the land.

   Those calling for its outright cancellation argued that it is an age long tradition that does not fit into the present trend. They revealed further that most parents seize the opportunity of bride price payment to enrich themselves, that payment of bride price reduces the bride to the status of a commodity, that   bride price in some cultures has put the potential groom under undue pressure among other reasons. While those who believed that bride price should not be abolished described it as a symbol of our cultural identity which is also supported by the two major religions and that any man who fail to pay bride price is not yet married even though  he has a woman under his roof, they are just co-habiting.

    Recently,  a Nigerian author, speaker and feminist, Chimamanda Adichie called for the cancellation of bride price during traditional wedding as she added that it ruins things. According to her, her father did not receive any bride price during her wedding, he just collected 10kobo to show that he had agreed to the marriage and maintained that she was not a fan of bride price payment. “I am not a fan of bride price. I think we should get rid of the whole idea of money in marriage, it ruins things. We are not selling anybody.”

    The Hope spoke with some people on their views regarding the payment of bride price. In the submission of a social commentator, Mr Toba Ajayi who opposed  the idea of paying bride price said that it is parochial and primitive and has no place in today’s world which he further argued that it is akin to auctioning one’s child.

When told that it was a way of upholding our tradition and value said.,”There is no amount of money that worth the value of a bride. I respect traditions but only when they enhances us as people. Bride price to me is enslaving the bride and gives the man undeseves sense of superiority.

    “Occasionally, when marital dispute arises between the couple, the man might taut his wife that upon the huge money he paid for her bride price, this is what he gets  from it. Besides, such money can be used for something else by the couple who are just starting a new life. So I do not see any good reason for paying bride price.”

    Sharing similar sentiment, a self employed woman, Mrs Adaobi Ebuka who likened  bride price payment to selling the bride to the highest bidder revealed that some men in order to meet the demand of the bride parents regarding the payment of the bride price go as far as borrowing to pay it. “I cannot support the payment of bride price because in some cultures like mine, paying it has become a big burden for most potential couples, it had even led to broken up of many engagements because the man could not cough out the huge amount the bride family think its suitable for their daughter.

   “Aside this, some men take the payment of bride price to mean that they own their wives leading to abuse and battering of the woman at the slightest provocation. Payment of bride price belong to the dark old days and should be abolished because there should not be a price tag on human being all in the name of culture.”

   Speaking differently, an Islamic Cleric, Alfa Abdulrasak Bala explained that the payment of bride price is very important in Islam and that it is the hallmark of traditional marriage which is refers to as “nikkai” in their religion. While expressing fear on the dangers of modernisation on our cherished cultural values appealed to parents to do everything to sustain our culture which he described as our identities. “The reason for traditional marriage is for the bride price to be paid. The issue of bride price in traditional marriage is so important that some cultures in our country will compelled a man to pay the bride price of his dead wife if he did not pay it while the woman was alive.

   “Payment of bride price is one of the beautiful part of our culture and should not be rejected by the bride’s father as what we are witnessing in Yoruba traditional marriages. If the Igbos, Hausas and other tribes in the country are collecting bride price as a fulfilment of our culture, why do yorubas reject it during the traditional marriages? This idea of the yorubas rejecting the bride price during traditional marriages is the reason some people came up with the senseless idea that it should be abolished. If this wrong notion of rejecting bride price is not corrected immediately, a time will come when the same people will be calling for cancellation of traditional marriage and see it as not important like the white wedding because we always like to embrace foreign culture and neglect ours. If not, how can people who were born in the 80s and 90s be calling for eradication of the same process that brought their parents together as husbands and wives? Tradition and culture out-altered  man and no one should there uttered it. “

    Corroborating the Islamic cleric,  a Pastor of the Redeemed Christian Church of God, Mr Sunday Olawale who also opposed the cancellation of bride price payment warned that such may spell doom for our age long culture and traditions. Olawale who opined that payment of bride price is a way of showing that we have not lost our cultural values said, “It is one of our cardinal beliefs  in the African tradition which is also upheld in the two major religions(Christianity and Islam).

   “It is sad and annoying that at this age, some people will be clamouring for the scrapping of bride price. Do they want to erode African culture for the white man culture? Remember that white man culture is foreign to us. Our fore-fathers married our mothers by paying their bride price why then is the practice wrong in our present generation? Marriage is not complete without payment of bride price even in the Bible, Isaac paid Rebecca’s bride price also Joseph, the father of Jesus Christ paid the bride price of Mary. If you marry without paying the bride price, it is seen as a taboo because the man has stolen a woman.”

    When told that some borrowed to pay bride price because of the huge amount of money demanded by the bride’s father said,”It does not change my opinion. If a man want to marry the woman she loved, he must be ready to meet the demands of the bride’s father that is one of the price one  has to pay to be a man. It is better than co-habitting with a woman and call her your wife. Engaging in such is seen by God as committing fornication which attracts God’s wrath”.