#In Our Neigbourhood

Travails of a woman

By Sunmola Olowookere

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Eves of this world especially in our part of the world are destined to carry much burden. The society see them as a vulnerable lot although they are made to face a lot of challenges; both physical and emotional ones.
Sometimes when they are referred to as to as the weaker sex, it sounds so ironic. How can a weaker sex carry the heavier load? The society gives so little to them yet expects a lot.
If fate were to be reversed and men are able to get pregnant, can they withstand the rigour of labour and delivery? Are they wired to nurse and nurture? Only God can tell.
The life of a woman is full of travails especially when she does not allow her mind to be at rest. She bears the brunt of an failing at the family front. Is the husband an adulterer? she must not be seductive enough or she does not give him rest of mind. Are his businesses or undertakings failing, she either has two left legs or is not praying enough?
Or are the children not doing well? they must take after their mother. The list is endless.
Simply put, the dictates of the African society does not favour a woman. She cannot do as she pleases. She cannot live alone if she so wishes.
She must be an appendage to a man to be seen as decent and complete. If not, she loses respect just because she is not under the thumb of a man.
A typical example was a woman in our neighbourhood. Mama favour’s lot in life has been from one wahala to the other. She has been unlucky in love. Early in life, she got married to a man she loved and had three children for him.
Life was kind to her and then she never had any inkling of the evil that exists in the world. She got married at a very tender age. She was barely twenty when she had her first issue. It was a boy then. In quick succession, she had three children. Life was rosy then and she had no cares in the world.
Then, trouble reared its ugly head and when she had grown complacent with her marriage, a much younger, smarter and more beautiful girl oust her from the nest and took her man away from her.
Her easy life became hell as her once-loving husband no longer cares about her and the children and turned his back on her. The shock of the betrayal and eventual separation nearly killed her. But she gathered her wits together and started over again.
That was how she left Lagos with the youngest child and came to live with her sister in our neighbourhood. She began to attend a Pentecostal church in the neighbourhood and they became her family.
Her sister later moved away from our neighbourhood but she stayed behind as she had been able to gather some money and began petty business to keep body and soul together.
About five years later, she realized that her husband was gone for good and decided to remarry especially when all efforts to reconcile her and her husband proved abortive.
There was a man that had been seeking her face for two years and she had been uncooperative. She began to show interest and the man encouraged began to shower her with gifts and attention.
Soon after this, she moved to his house and she had a bouncing baby boy for him. They were a lovely couple to behold as they go to church on Sundays, dressed gaily in their aso ebi. They lived together for two years in peace and love.
M a m a Favour was looking beautiful and radiant and all the people that saw her could see that she was at peace at last. When life improves for human beings and they are happy, it is as if they never suffered.
However, joys sometimes do not last. It is as if there are some unseen wicked hands that snatched the happiness away believing that they do not have the right to be happy
Such was the woman’s case as her husband became sick suddenly and died within two days of the illness. It was without dispute the most terrible shock of the year as the news filtered from one ears to the other in the neighbourhood and as you know, bad news travels fast.
Residents rush to mama Favour’s house to enquire whether it was true.
The scene that met our eyes was saddening indeed as yours truly was among the sympathizers. It was enough evidence that indeed, the unthinkable had happened. Mama Favour was rolling on the ground and bemoam’ng her tragic fate.
People stood around in groups bemoaning the fate of the poor woman.
”He! Akureoooo! My life has spoilt. My people, you are watching me. Let me drink cement and put an end to this miserable life. Oh! I am done for.”
Sympathisers were holding her down and urging her to take things easy while some women who could not hold back their tears wept uncontrollably. It was indeed tragic. Where would the woman start from?

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