By Maria Famakinwa

In the past, virginity was held in high esteem and celebrated. It was not only a pride for parents whose daughters were confirmed virgins by their husbands on the wedding night, they were celebrated and presented with gifts.

Due to the importance and sacredness attached to virginity then, parents especially mothers, drum into the ears of their girls once they reached puberty, the need to keep their bodies for their future husbands. The same cannot be said in our modem day society where virginity is almost lost if not completely forgotten. If a lady today tell anyone that she is a virgin, such will be looked at with surprise, doubt and will be considered as old fashioned.

Opinions however differed when The Hope spoke with some unmarried men if they would prefer to marry virgins. Some of them who said that they would prefer virgin ladies as wives, maintained that it would be herculean task to get them as wives in today’s world, while others revealed that being a virgin was not as important as having a good character, that they would rather go for non virgins who would be wives’ materials.

In the submission of an Engineer, Mr Oluwatoyin Iranlowo, the joy of marriage starts with getting a bride who truly worth the call. He added: “Do you know that getting married to a virgin spice up the joy of the groom and make their honey moon what it should be?

“The essence of the honey moon is for the groom to get intimately with the bride. But once the bride is not a virgin, the first night as a couple become boring. Though, virginity is no longer given its pride of place in today’s world, it does not mean that reasonable men like me don’t value it. I want to marry a virgin if I am lucky to get one,” he said.

Also desirous of a virgin bride is a civil servant who simply want to be identified as Kayode. He described virgin ladies as very wonderful beings to glue to because they make better and sexually trustworthy wives whose trust could never be in doubt.

He said: “It will be difficult to satisfy a non virgin sexually because she is already exposed. A deflowered girl can hardly stop asking for more unless God does a profound miracle because of her urge for variety to explore sexually. A non virgin woman has seen it all when it comes to sex and if her husband don’t measure up to her experience, there is bound to be a problem. This is unlike a virgin lady with no previous sexual experience to compare her husband with. She will accept whatever her husband is able to offer her sexually and will never go out to seek for better sex partners as it is the case today. Virgins are sexually naïve and put the minds of their husbands to rest.”

A Corps member, Mr Ben Ndubuisi, who revealed that one of his prayer points was to marry a virgin, explained that getting a virgin as a bride deepens marital happiness and greater level of satisfaction and added that people have a mindset of associating decency and good character with virginity.

His words: “For a lady to still remain a virgin in this present day, tells you how decent she is. Being a virgin is a sign of self control which means that she has a higher chance to remain faithful when married. My choice is to marry a virgin. That cannot be negotiated.”

When told that some men preferred non virgins, he said: “They are pretenders. Let them go to brothels and pick their wives to show that they truly don’t want virgins as brides.”

Speaking differently, a public servant, Mr Babatunde, said that he was not dogmatic about getting married to a virgin and that what matter to him was getting married to a lady who would give him marital peace.

He said: “There are ladies who fell victims of rape when they were young, that does not mean they are bad. Also some were loose but have changed genuinely. That is why I am not dogmatic about marrying a virgin but a lady who will give me marital peace.”

Sharing a similar view, a businessman, Mr Olaitan Alayemi, hinted that being a virgin was not a criteria but good conduct.

He said: “If a virgin lady is not submissive, loving and caring, her virginity might not qualify her as my wife material. Who says virgin ladies are saints in term of character?  Can someone celebrate a virgin who is a failure in life? Is anyone proud of a virgin lady with unteachable spirit?

“Unmarried men should be careful in order not to miss a wife material in the quest for virgin ladies. The first thing to look out for is whether the lady meet your criteria for a good wife, because virginity qualification will end on your wedding night, what then happens in the days and years ahead? Being a virgin should not be the yardstick for a good wife, I even doubt it if there are still virgins around in today’s world when Junior School girls are already running after men. So, any man craving for a virgin lady will wait till eternity,” he said.

A banker, Mr Desmond Olatunbosun, said that he would rather prefer to marry non virgin because of her initial sexual experience.

He said: “I don’t want a virgin for a bride. In fact, if a lady I am planning to marry tells me that she is a virgin, that ends the relationship. It is more stressful getting married to a sexual novice. Such has to be handled like an egg and will always need your attention. Besides, I am not a virgin and so, I don’t need a virgin. Most men run away from virgin ladies due to the stress they will go through during and after sexual intimacy. Virgins ladies denied one of sexual pleasure and make their men feel bad during their first night. I don’t want a virgin for a bride,” he added.