#Feminine line

Don’t mount pressure on single ladies

By Josephine Oguntoyinbo


Singlehood is a stage that every individual must pass through. Before a woman moves on with her husband or before a man cleaves to his wife, they would have been single for sometime.
That means that after a period of time, a guy or a lady is expected to leave his or her parent’s home and start a new life with their spouses, even though this is the norm and tradition, it is not sacrosanct.
Many singles desire to be married but if the right partner is not forthcoming, will they go ahead to commit suicide? Or will they go to the altar to be joined with an inanimate object? Obviously no!
When a lady, particularly, should be married, and she is not, people around her, family, friends and outsiders will begin to mount pressure on her as if her existence is threatened without a life partner.
The situation is even worse in the typical African society where the woman is at the receiving end in every circumstance.
What many fail to know is that some people are happier being single than when they become joined to another person. Some people are even aware that they can never be happy with their prospective spouse but they will still go ahead and mortgage their destinies. Such people usually go with the school of thought which projects that marriage can only be endured, it cannot be enjoyed.
Fine, there could be challenges in the union but to say that marriage cannot be enjoyed is the highest level of disease. The initiator of the institution made it such that it could be enjoyed.
Unfortunately, the fear of not wanting to remain single for a long time have made people take several wrong steps. This has consequently had terrible effects on the victims.
For goodness sake, Singlehood is not a disease. If the guy is not coming at the expected time, he will come later. Moreover, God is not a man . And when it comes to timing, God and men could be very different.
While waiting, search yourself very well to be sure that you do not have any bad attitude that could make men run away from you. You have to be right before you can get a Mr right.
Whatever the sex, the stage of being single is very sensitive. The woman, particularly, has to be careful at this stage so that she does not fall prey into the wrong hands.
The best way to live a satisfying life at this stage is to work on one’s self confidence. You should not have the feeling that you are lonely, miserable or inferior just because you are single. In as much as you need a company, you have to be friendly with yourself. This will go a long way at shaping your relationship.
As much as it is good to be independent minded, no one is an island. A lady should be friendly with both sexes. There are possibilities that you will marry from among your male friends. Better still you can never tell if the guy you will eventually get married to is a brother, uncle or cousin of any of your friends. If you are the unfriendly type you might hamper your chances because no one wants his relative to get married to a snub.
All though it is good to mix up and make as many friends as possible, always remember that bad company corrupt good manner. Whatever steps taken at this stage will definitely have serious implications whether immediately or later, therefore act wisely.
Also, good looks should be desired by every single ladies. If a lady does not take care of herself, she will attract unkept persons to her, dress well and look good,
If you think you have done your best as far as your creator can help you, then leave the rest and enjoy the best of Singlehood. Remember, once the marriage happens, you cannot reverse to those beautiful days of Singlehood, therefore, enjoy it.

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